It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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