I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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