It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
