I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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