nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
So vagazzling was a success
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
there is puke in my bra ... again
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
