it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
