I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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