I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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