The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
