she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
There's always time for handjobs
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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