I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
