I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
