I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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