Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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