Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
