Pants 0. Shit 1.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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