My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
