question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
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