remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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