The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
