Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Randomize
