I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
vagina is talking i cant
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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