is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
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