When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize