You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
There's even glitter on my cock...
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