Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
