we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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