At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
