If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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