what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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