It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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