You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize