i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
