i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
We're too hungover to prance.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
i think i just lost a toe
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
