Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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