There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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