this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
