I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
