do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
