they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
