This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize