Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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