There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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