K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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