yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize