he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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