Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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