i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize