Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
