This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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