Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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