For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i used baking grease as lip gloss
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
