so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
